First Attempts at Writing
I was flipping through some old folders the other day (I am one of those people who NEVER throws anything sentimental away) and I found something that really put a smile on my face. It was the first fiction story I ever wrote, in March 2004, when I was eight. When I was little, my parents owned a book fair buisiness and we would travel all around the state to different Christian schools selling books. I had a lot of down time, so one day when I was bored I wrote out this story on the back of some unused order forms. Later I took it home and went through the laborious task of typing it out and drawing little illustrations to go with it.
Anyway, reading through this story was a very weird experience. I was half laughing, half cringing the whole way through because it is really, really bad. For starters, the main character is supposed to be named “Olivia”, but I incorrectly spelled it “Alivia” on every page. And also…. well, I’ll spare you all of my criticisms and let you read it for yourself with all the original grammer and spellings. The weird thing is that while I was writing I got bored after about the fourth page and just stopped it abruptly. Then I didn’t write any more fiction for four more years, until I was in sixth grade. By then, things were looking a whole lot better.
Here it is, titled “A Lovely Young Dream”: (Go ahead and laugh) I went ahead and put my own commentary in bold for your enjoyment, but if you have any more remarks, please share. Just be nice, because I still consider this work a major masterpiece. 🙂
“Once upon a time there was a young princess named Alivia. Her hair was as golden as the sun, and it had tree brown highlights. [I was very into comparing things with nature] Her hair went down to her heels and her blue eyes sparkled. She dressed and acted like other princesses but she believed in something they did not. She believed in God. Her mother had died when Alivia was five, but had led her to Christ first. It was hard for Alivia to hold on to her beliefs because so many bad things were happening. [Prepare yourself] Her father was deathly ill, one of her friends had died, and a disease was overtaking her village. [Because being a princess is tough]
“Because of all the troubles Alivia lived with her friends Isabella, Elizabeth, and Lisa. [They were the ones who didn’t die] ‘It’s cold in here.’ Her friend Elizabeth shivered. Elizabeth had long brown hair and lovely blue eyes. ‘I know,’ complained Isabella. She had long blonde hair and green eyes. Her curls were to die for. [Like, for real] She was petite and short.[Petite and short] ‘I’m starved,’ said Lisa. Lisa was tall and willowy. She had long blondish red hair, and green eyes. Alivia rolled her eyes. ‘I don’t see why you aren’t fat,’ she said looking at the skinny girl, ‘You are always hungry.’ Lisa pouted her lower lip, ‘A growing girl needs lots of food, and besides, we did not eat breakfast,’ the ballerina complained. [Did I mention they were ballerinas? I think I just decided to throw that in] The other ballerina princesses rolled their eyes.
“Suddenly the maid Rebecca danced in. ‘Here is your lunch,’ she sang, [I watched too many Disney musicals as a child] ‘I am so sorry you ladies could not have breakfast.’ They feasted on grapes, fried chicken, biscets, soup and crackers, [Can you tell I was hungry when I wrote this?] and a basket which had apples, oranges, bananas, and peaches in it. [Good grief] ‘Yum!’ declared Lisa as she ate her last crumb of cake. [I don’t remember listing cake, but I’m not suprised it’s there] Then Rachel (who was the head of the house) [Yes!] poked her head in. ‘Tonight a ball will be held. Do you girls have something to wear?’ ‘Yes, ma’am’ the girls chorused.
“When Rachel and Rebecca had left the girls talked about what they were going to wear to the ball. [And here comes the real drama…] Isabella said, ‘I’m going to wear my blue gown with my diamond jewelry set.’ Lisa said, ‘Oh, yeah? Well I’m going to wear my green dress with my emerald jewelry set.’ ‘I’m wearing my red dress with my ruby jewelry set,’ said Elizabeth. ‘Girls stop it! (silence) I’m wearing my pink gown with my feather cape and my pearl jewelry set,’ Alivia said. [And that’s how you settle an argument] And so the girls went on their way to the ball and lived happily ever after.
[And the moral of this story? In the end, feather capes will always dominate]
Now if someone will just give me the address of the head of the Pulitzer Prize comittee, I will mail them the original manuscript. 🙂