Top Ten Cheesy Movie Lines I Quote, Like, All the Time
1. “With God as my witness, I’ll never go hungry again!” – Gone With the Wind
I say when I’m absolutely starving and, despite all the food in the house, there is nothing to eat. Under such circumstances, I grit my teeth, grasp a handful of cheerios, goldfish, or whatever is available, and stand up on a kitchen chair reciting this line. I just leave the whole “If I have to lie and cheat and steal and kill” part that comes before it. I feel like that’s taking it a little too far.
2. “You’re like my soul sister!” – Confessions of a Shopaholic
Is it terrible that I’ve seen this movie? I think so. I should probably never mention it again. But, seriously, this quote is perfect for any situation when it feels like someone has totally just read your mind. You watch Pirates of the Caribbean with the subtitles on, too? You’re like my soul sister!
3. “It should take you four seconds to walk from here to that door. I’ll give you two.” – Breakfast at Tiffany’s
An obvious winner for whenever you want to get someone to leave. And you also don’t mind them getting really mad at you. Because that quote is a lot harsher than just saying, “Weeeell, it’s getting late and I have a lot of things to do tomorrow.” Hint hint.
4. “I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!” – Napoleon Dynamite
Another embarrassing movie, but an absolutely perfect comeback if anyone asks you how you spent summer vacation and you don’t have anything better to say than, “Oh, I went to the pool and, you know, did… stuff.”
5. “Oh, wait! I forgot to give you a hug!” – Elf
Perfect for freaking out people. Probably most effective when you’re getting off an elevator and want to disturb that random woman who stood in silence next to you for the last three and a half minutes. What? It’s not like you’ll ever see her again. Hopefully.
6. “What excellent boiled potatoes.” – Pride and Prejudice (2005)
I just like to say this whenever we have boiled potatoes. No other reason.
7. “Never let go. Promise me, and never let go of that promise.” – Titanic
Every time I give something to a member of my family, I clasp their hand and whisper, “Never let go. Never.” Then, depending on the family member, she’ll either roll her eyes and say, “Wow. Lame, Rachel,” or reenact the final minutes of the sinking of that great ship.
8. “We are worms! Worthless worms!” – Hercules
Okay, so you probably would have to see Hercules to appreciate how funny this quote is. Have you seen it, when the creepy little monster things turn into worms? My sister Hannah and I can do a dead-on impersonation, groveling to our mom when we mess up. Usually we wind up rolling around in laughter at how ridiculous we are. Yeah, it’s pretty strange.
9. “A red sun rises. Blood has been spilt this night.” – Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
You gotta love how dramatic the people in LOTR are. If I saw a red sky in the morning, I would probably just think, “Oh, how pretty. Now I have something nice to look at while mindlessly stalking orcs.” Instead they have to be all morbid and depressing. Now I can’t look at a red sunrise without thinking of this line!
10. “Iocane powder! I’d bet my life on it!” – The Princess Bride
Obviously there’d have to be a Princess Bride quote on it. I seriously use every single quote from that movie, but this one especially. There’s just something so funny about hearing someone ask, “What on earth is this?” and jumping up with a loud, “It’s iocane powder! I’d bet my life on it!” The great thing is that everyone gets it. Well, everyone except the poor, deprived people who never saw this great movie. Shame on them.
[Photo by Tim Walker]